A Peculiar Predicament
by Indigo Reveries
Summary: Looks like the Smashers are facing a new problem, but this time, it isn't an enemy! When a mystical artifact is damaged, a few get hit by side effects. Watch as the Smashers attempt to get through everyday life in the weird conditions they get stuck in until the spell wears off. And to think all this happened because of a few kids...
1. The Gem in the Attic

**Heya! Scales here, with yet another fic! I know, I'm already working on another one, but hey, I have way too much free time. Or maybe I don't. Yes, I need to update Wizard of Brawl, But I've hit a writer's block after the last chapter which had a few of its own flaws... Anyways , I wanted to put this into Smash Mansion Oddities, but I thought that one got too crappy. Yeah… I'll discontinue that.**

**Now Marth, do the disclaimer!**

**Marth: *sigh* Shining Scales doesn't own SSBB or the characters. *rolls eyes* **_**Not that she ever will…**_

***snort* I can dream, right? Whatevs. I own nothing but my ideas!**

**Enjoy the first chapter of **_**A Peculiar Predicament!**_

* * *

"Hah, I win! I totally owned you, Lucas!"

"Dang it Ness, you KNOW I'm bad at Mario Party!"

"Pfft, you really lost pretty badly though. Admit it."

"Popo. Please. Just don't."

The day was actually normal so far (by Brawl standards, of course) and the Smashers were goofing off. More or less. Some more than others… Wait, I'm getting off track.

So, it was a rest day for the Smashers, which meant that they didn't have any matches or SSE replays. And since they had a nice day to relax and it was (only) 10 in the morning, an awful lot of them were still sleeping. Not many were awake. Among those who were awake were Lucas, Ness and Popo, who were playing Mario Party 9 in the rec room like there was no tomorrow. As you can probably guess, Lucas lost miserably while Ness won by a mile. They were playing for quite some time now, and it was a miracle they hadn't woke the others… Not that they want to. Some of their fellow Smashers could get really grouchy in the mornings...

"Can't we just go outside or something? I'm tired of playing MP now." Lucas sighed.

Popo looked out the window. "I guess, since it's really sunny right now. I bet it's nice and warm."

Ness shrugged, walking over to turn off the Wii. "Then let's go, there's nothing to stop us, right?"

Then Popo suddenly started grinning. "I have an idea…" Lucas gulped. The kid didn't like the glint in his friend's eyes.

The Ice Climber then exclaimed: "How about we explore the mansion? If it's so old and huge, don't you guys think that there'll be shortcuts and secret passages and stuff?" The mischievous glint in Popo's eyes got even brighter.

Ness immediately jumped up and nodded eagerly, and Lucas paled.

The two dragged the poor blonde off.

* * *

In the garden, a certain blue-haired mercenary was sparring with a masked blue puffball, conversing while exchanging blows. Pit and Red were close by, the latter teaching the former how to handle pokemon.

"Ike, does Marth usually sleep in this late?"

Ike shrugged, parrying a slash from his opponent and countering.

"It's rest day. He always sleeps in on rest days."

Meta Knight dodged before stabbing at the mercenary, who blocked the attack easily. "Hmph. I never noticed. Should I wake him?"

Ike blanched and panicked for a second, causing him to rashly swipe at his partner.

"Don't even THINK about it! He'll just start bitching about us waking him up!"

The puffball used this opportunity to strike, knocking Ike back. Ike scrambled back up, lifting his sword just in time to block another quick stab.

Meta Knight jumped away from Ike, who had once again recklessly swiped at him. "And why might that be?"

Ike cringed while getting in a defensive stance. "He's not a morning person. Just don't. If you do, you'll be in a world of pain. Trust me. I should know."

The knight tilted his head to the side, which looked pretty funny since his entire body WAS his head. Then he seemed to understand and grimaced under his mask.

"Oh. Then I believe I should take your advice and leave him alone." He muttered while idly twirling his sword, watching Pit trying to calm down an overexcited Charizard who was spewing fire everywhere.

"Do that. Just don't wake him up."

After saying that, Ike's head abruptly turned to the mansion and he sniffed the air. "Food." he muttered, before bounding off to the building they called home.

Meta Knight's eyes flickered pink in amusement before sprinting after his friend.

* * *

Well, Ike was right about the food part. Zelda and Peach were making lunch, or brunch, or whatever you people eat at this time. Nana and Pikachu were setting the (humongous) table, and the whole place smelled positively delicious. But it still wasn't enough to wake the others. Or bring any of them inside.

"HEY, WHAT'S FOR LUNCH?"

Okay, strike that. Ike's here. He plopped himself on his seat, Meta Knight coming in after him and seating himself next to where Marth normally sits. The Altean was still sleeping like a rock and Link-

"I smell bacon!"

Okay, forget whatever I was about to say. Link's here too. Most likely because of that unnaturally keen sense of smell he got when he turned into a wolf. The Hylian currently seemed to be having a REALLY bad case of bedhead, his blond hair was sticking out in every direction, but he didn't seem to care. He grinned and plopped himself down next to Ike.

"Whazzup?" Link asked.

"Meh. Got hungry." Ike answered giving Link a high-five.

A few more Smashers came in and sat down and started putting (or in Kirby's case, heaping) food on their plates.

And none of them knew what was going on in the attic...

* * *

Meanwhile, Popo, Ness and Lucas found their way into the attic. The very dusty one. At the top of the mansion. The one that only a few Smashers know about. Yeah, that one. Popo happened to stumble over the entrance (although he actually crashed into it, which earned a chuckle from Lucas and a guffaw from Ness) and they naturally went through. They were looking through the old junk that had collected over the years, laughing at photographs and pointing out funny faces. At the moment, Popo was leafing through something that looked like a diary while occasionally bursting out in laughter, Ness was rummaging through a chest full of worn, torn and partially scorched clothes and Lucas was pacing around the room anxiously.

"Guys? I'm getting the feeling that we weren't meant to be here..." Lucas muttered, turning towards the other two.

Popo looked up from the book he was holding. "Well duh, of course! Why else would they hide the entrance for this place so well?"

Lucas stopped for a moment, then continued pacing, glancing at the trap door every now and then. Somewhere in a corner, Ness laughed, holding up an old tunic that had the remains of a few firecrackers and scorch marks on it, making it near impossible to guess the color of the old rag.

"Oh gosh, I remember this! That time where Roy decided to light a few firecrackers and toss it into Marth's room..."

Lucas turned towards the black-haired PSI user with a look of pure confusion. "Who's Roy?" Lucas asked, sitting down on the ground. Popo was trying to recall who Roy was.

Popo then seemed to remember, snapping his fingers before diving into a large box filled with more journals. Lucas turned back to Ness.

"So... Who is he?"

Ness grinned. "Back when we were in Melee, another sword dude from the same world as our blue-haired princess." He giggled. "Roy was a total pyromaniac, he looked almost exactly like a red-haired version of big bro Pit, around the same age, too."

The Ice Climber stopped rummaging in the box and laughed. "That scrap used to be Marf's tunic? Ya serious?" He collapsed in peals of laughter. "I only remembered him looking really mad with his hair half-scorched! Roy must've had a lot of guts ta throw those in his ROOM! He's BATSHIT CRAZY, I tell you!"

Lucas started laughing too. Imagining the Altean's perfect room in complete disarray... Not to mention blackened hair.

Ness suddenly stopped laughing and looked at the ground with a sad expression on his face. "Too bad he had to leave after Melee ended..." The black-haired boy went back to the chest.

Popo wiped a tear from his eye after his last chuckles died down, and leaned his head to the side. He shrugged with a reminiscent smile on his face before getting back to rummaging through the box.

Lucas flicked a dust bunny. He still felt uneasy about being in the attic. As if something unexplainable was residing there... He stood up and began pacing around again, looking around the room, when Popo suddenly jumped up with a red hardcover journal in his hands.

"YES! Found it!"

Startled, the blonde jumped and crashed against a wall and fell right through, yelling a curse that a kid his age shouldn't know (that he most likely learned from Ike or Link). The other two stared at the spot that their friend was standing on a few moments ago before Ness bounded after him, crashing through the wall as well. Popo continued staring at the hidden door blankly before looking at the book in his hands and stowing it in his parka for safekeeping. Breaking into a run, he ran against the wall to feel himself falling through...

...

After what seemed like forever, the poor Ice Climber finally hit the ground and smacking face first into Ness' back, causing both to fall over.

"AGH!"

"Uah!"

It took a while for them to stop quarreling and look in Lucas' direction.

"Uh, Lucas? Ya' okay?"

The blond was gaping, still as a statue and pointing at something. He looked like a fish out of water.

"Dude! Stop making that stupid face an' give us a sign you're still alive!"

Ness waved a hand in front of Lucas' face. The latter jumped, before glancing at his friends and frantically gesturing towards what he was pointing to earlier.

Popo raised an eyebrow before looking where Lucas was pointing.

"Oh my icicles." Ness followed the Ice Climber's gaze.

"Shiny..." he whispered, gaping at the item Lucas had been gaping at in a similar manner. Except that Ness possibly looked even more retarded than Lucas did a few paragraphs ago.

It was a gem.

A huge one.

Standing on an intricately carved marble pedestal.

About as big as Ness' head, and if you think about that, then that's pretty big. It continuously changed colors and sparkled in the dim light of the room the trio landed in. The light projected itself onto the walls, making the room itself feel magical.

The two PSI kids also felt a huge amount of power radiating off it.

Then Lucas burst into a theory of what it could be.

"DEAR GOD LUCAS, WE CAN FIND OUT WHAT IT IS OURSELVES!" Both of the others yelled simultaneously before glancing at each other with freaked out expressions. Even Lucas looked spooked.

And there was an awkward silence.

...

C'mon, say something!

Lucas looked at the ground sheepishly. "Alright, alright, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to break into a long line of rambling."

"Oh, that's fi-"

That's when Popo slipped on a random oxygen molecule and was sent flying. He crashed into the pedestal, making it wobble and causing the other two to gasp and jump in case the gem which seemed like a magical artifact would fall and break into a million pieces.

The Gem rolled towards the edge...

Balanced on the corner, ready to fall...

The three held their breaths...

And...

It stopped.

The three sighed in relief, letting out a breath they didn't know they were holding.  
That was all the gem needed.

CRASH!

It shattered upon impact, bursting into a million tiny fragments before dissolving.

The three stared at each other.

"LET'S GET THE HECK OUTTA HERE!"

All three bolted.

What they didn't notice was that a small wisp of light that escaped and follow them downstairs.


	2. Food Fight to the DEATH!

**Aaaand-**

**Another chappie of APP!**

**Enjoy, my dear readers! And a cookie for dem reviewers! :D (::)  
**

**Marth: Well, aren't you generous. And... *looks at plot* Oh god, do I really-?**

**Yes. Shut up.**

***clears throat* ON WITH THE STORY!**

* * *

The few people who were in the kitchen were digging into their breakfasts of pancakes, bacon, toast, waffles and whatever the hell was on their plates at the moment. Ike was noisily munching on a chicken wing. Toon Link was downing a glass of milk, wondering where in Hyrule Popo, Ness and Lucas were, Peach was flipping pancakes (like a boss) Kirby was sucking in everything in sight (including other Smashers) and soon every Smasher present was involved in a HUGE food fight. (Totally normal.)

Yep. Everybody not present were still snoozing in their beds.

Except the trio of troublemakers.

"HOLY MOTHER OF CRUD, WHAT'RE WE GONNA DO?"

"Shh! STFU Ness!"

"Yelling that doesn't help, you know!"

"I DUN CARE! WE'RE GONNA DIIIIIEEEEE-"

"I SAID SHUT UP ALREADY!"

"Guys! At least analyze the situation for a moment!"

"THAT AIN'T YO JOB!"

"Yes it is, Popo! We assigned each of our group to a specifi-"

"SHUT UP AND RUN!"

"CAN WE STOP ACTING LIKE CRIMINALS?"

The noise of the food fight downstairs drifted upstairs quietly, the huge corridor somehow managing to make the ruckus vaguely sound like footsteps. Keyword VAGUELY.

"CRAP! I THINK SOMEONE'S COMING!" Popo screamed. And of course, as panicked as the three were, they couldn't tell the difference between a food fight and a person.

The trio dived in through a random blue-painted door, which they assumed it led to an empty room.

Three words.

BIGGEST. MISTAKE. EVER.

"AWW SONUVA-"

"FUDGE-A-DUCK!"

"We're dead."

"GUCHI NO ANATA WA SUKOSHI HITO NO MUSUKO!"

* * *

Downstairs, the Smashers were blissfully unaware of the slaughter going on not too far away. Food was flying everywhere, Peach and Zelda were desperately trying to stop the food fight, and the others were throwing pie in each other's faces. (What? Those weren't even part of the breakfast...) Even the ever-so-uptight Meta Knight was throwing maple syrup. Ike was hoarding the meat and throwing random slabs of it when someone came too close. Kirby was protecting himself by sucking in any projectiles that happened to come his way. After spitting out a few Smashers he ate earlier. Fox was slapping Wolf in the face with a slap of cheese. Wolf was majorly getting pwnd. Toon Link somehow got his hands on a machine gun and went into evil-dictator mode, shooting scrambled eggs everywhere. Link was buried under a giant heap of sandwiches with Red. Pit? He disappeared.

"MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I VILL KEEL U ALLLLLLLLL"

...That wasn't me. Ask Toonie.

"DAMN YOU AND YOUR FUCKING SLABS OF CHEESE!"

"Tough luck Wolf!"

"Guys! Easy on the language!"

"I DON'T GIVE A FUCK, WOMAN"

"HIIII!"

"What did you SAY?" Peach charged forward to maul Wolf with a frying pan.

"Help!"

"Not now, Link! Trying to make some peace here!"

"I said: HELP!" Link stuck his arms out of the pile of sandwiches, flailing.

"NO! NOT NOW!"

"You say I'm BORING? WELL I'LL SHOW YA BORING!" Cue Meta Knight flying around with a water gun full of syrup.

"Gah! Maple syrup in my eye!"

"MY CHICKEN"

"ALL HAIL CARTOONS"

A (manly) scream from Wolf's direction. Peach was hunting him down with a sniper.

"GREAT... **PIZZA!**"

"What the fuck, Ike!"

Ike had finally decided to move out of his meat fort and cause mass destruction with a pizza alongside Toon Link.

"GUYS, HELP ME!"

"HIII!"

"I'M BEING SUFFOCATED BY A SAMMICH!"

"PREPAH YAHSEHLFS!"

"NOT NOW, LINK!"

"WELL I'M BEING SUFFOCATED BY YOUR HAT!"

"GET BACK HERE WOLF SO I CAN KILL YOU, 1-UP YOU, AND KILL YOU AGAIN!"

"NEVAAAA"

And that's when Pit decided to charge in from the kitchen on a terrifying mixture of a sugar high and caffeine rush. I have no idea how he managed to get that at 11 in the morning that quickly.

"'ELLO, GOVNAH! lakdsjflafj!"

"Why is everybody talking in caps lock?!"

"WHY ARE YOU BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL?"

"SCOOOOONNNEEEEESSS"

"HIII!"

"GET BACK HERE YOU STUPID EXCUSE FOR A CANIDAE!"

"EAT EGGS!"

Multiple screams and the mechanical whirring of a machine gun firing scrambled eggs.

"*insert Japanese gibberish about chicken conquering the world here*"

"lkdsfj;alsfjl;skdfj;lasdkfjsldaf! heyguysdidjahearthascreamingfromupstairs?!;lfajdsl f jdal;fjj;salfj"

Isn't it weird that Pit was the only one to notice the screams from the floor above them?

Even weirder that everybody else was still asleep even through the combined noise of the massive food fight and said screams of torment upstairs.

And that nobody heard Pit who crashed through a window and was flying loop-the-loops outside.

* * *

Upstairs, all hell was breaking loose in the form of a grouchy, crabby, sleep-deprived and _very_pissed off Altean. The three kids were whimpering for mercy while the Altean bellowed at them in Japanese, drowsiness preventing him from approaching the situation with more discipline. Luckily, Lucas and Popo weren't able to understand what the prince was screaming at them in rapid-fire Japanese.

Completely different story for Ness. He was sobbing and flinching at every second word. Better not ask him what Marth was screaming, for the sake of this fic remaining T rated.

He was gonna be scarred for life.

That's when Marth decided to grab Falchion and charge at them, making the three scream, jump up, and run, trying to escape with their lives. Popo and Lucas were forced to drag a sobbing Ness.

* * *

Ike suddenly snapped out of pizza-Ragnell mode and dropped the slice of pizza he was assaulting Meta Knight with. His eye twitched.

"Oh god no." Everybody froze in place to see why Ike suddenly stopped in his ruthless rampage for worldwide meat conquest.

He turned to the others with his face as white as a sheet. Everybody else blanched when they saw the terrified expression on the mercenary's face. Peach dropped her sniper. "Is it bad?" Red asked, sticking his head out of the sandwiches and spitting Link's hat out.

"Somebody woke Marth up."

Link immediately jumped out of the sandwich pile and ran for his life, not even bothering with his hat (Why couldn't he have done that earlier?), while the tomato sauce and maple syrup smeared Meta Knight teleported away with his Dimensional Cape. Toon Link squeaked, dropped his egg-gun and ran after his older counterpart. Everybody else stared at him in confusion.

Well, whatever questions they had were answered when Popo, Ness and Lucas charged down the steps, screaming bloody murder (Which was perfectly accurate in this case.). Ness was sobbing, blubbering something between the lines of losing his innocence in Japanese, Popo was too scared to even scream, and Lucas was yelling for help. All three were seriously scuffed up.

And what they saw next was so shocking that some bolted and some couldn't decide whether to laugh or to run away like the other swordsmen. You know who it is.

It was VeryPissedOff!Marth in blue fluffy penguin PJs with a bedhead that could have been worthy of a punk, Falchion clutched in his right hand and tiara clutched in his left.

When the prince spotted the mess in the kitchen, everybody present knew they were doomed. Said Altean let out a scream of rage at the huge mess (courtesy of his neat-freak genes) and began trying to Critical Hit everybody in the room, luckily managing to miss every time.

That's when Ike attempted the impossible.

Talk some sense into the drowsy and crabby prince.

...

Upon which he promptly got kicked in the nuts.

Hard.

"SONUVABETCH!" The poor mercenary squeaked, his voice one or two octaves higher than it should have been.

"SEIKO!" Marth flipped him the bird and passed out in a dead faint when Red hit Marth over the head with a piece of stale bread. (Rhyme! :D)

Ike was rolling on the floor in pain, holding his groin.

And that's when the rest of the mansion woke up. All at once. Seems legit.

Mario came bounding down the stairs, nightcap askew. "What happened-? Oh." The others followed Mario's lead.

The plumber narrowed his eyes at Ike rolling around on the ground in pain, Marth unconscious and Red standing over the Altean with the loaf of bread.

"Alright, who woke him up?" Everybody glared at the three scuffed up troublemakers who looked at their feet.

At least the rest of the day went relatively normal, and the ones who participated in the food fight had to clean up the dining room. Except that Donkey Kong got stuck in the camera while getting screen KO'd. And Marth had no idea whatsoever why everybody ran away whenever he walked into a room. Pit went for a little flight to wear off his caffeine buzz/sugar rush and came back by curfew. Ness meanwhile recovered, acting normal again. Everyone was asleep by 10.

During that, the magic of the crystal was slowly working its way through the bodies of a few select Smashers.

Well, looks like we'll have to wait till they wake up tomorrow.

* * *

**Filler! xDDD *shot*  
**

**Sorry, I just wanted Marth to go berserk over someone messing with his sleep. The real stuff'll happen next chapter :P Sorry, but the part with Marth waking up was absolutely necessary for me .3.**

**Ciao till next chapter!**

**As for the occasional shout in Japanese from Marth, use Translate. ;P**

**Marth: Not my fault they woke me up with their screaming, it's as if all hell broke loose, honestly.**

***slaps duct tape on his mouth***

**~Scales out!**


	3. A Three-fourth Cup of Wasted Tea

**Ermahgerd so many reviews~! *flails happily***

**Thank yooooouuuuuuu~ *tackle hugs the reviewers* And to 12345, I would've PMed you what Marth said, but then again I didn't 'cause I didn't really want to overuse the F word. :P Would be nice if you had an account, though. *glances at the reviews some more* Sheesh, lots are asking what our favourite prince said. Alright, alright, I'll put it in the ANs at the bottom. *looks at the reviews some more***

***sees the reviewer with bazooka* AHHH! I'M SORRY! THIS WON'T BE A FILLER! *runs and uses Marth as a meatshield* Oh, and I finally decided on what'll happen to the Smashers. Enjoy!**

**Marth: What the f-!**

**Let the story commence!**

* * *

Morning. Ah, sweet, wonderful morning. The rising sun shining through the window into the Smasher's rooms, casting the furniture in a warm, golden glow. But it was stupid o' clock in the morning and almost everybody was asleep.

Almost.

Ike was an extremely early riser (even though it seemed unlikely) and had hopped out of bed, carefully though, just in case he might wake Marth up. We got a demonstration of how terrifying he could be last chapter, anyways. That already was the second time that happened while Ike was present, and that alone was enough for a lifetime for anybody. And it was just Ike's luck he got stuck with sharing a room with him and Meta Knight. Not that he minded, the prince was usually very well-mannered. So here he was, wandering the halls in stupid o' clock in the morning.

And, as oblivious as he was, he didn't notice two key points:

1. He was walking around in nothing but his boxers and a black undershirt.

The second one? Heck, I won't tell you that yet.

But someone's gonna flip when they see Ike's situation. And by someone, I don't really mean Ike.

Although he might go into pizza-terrorist mode again. I don't really think he could handle what happened to him too well, no matter how composed he is.

Back to subject.

So Ike was wandering the halls, oblivious of other things happening while the others slept, humming a tune to himself. He was heading to the kitchen to grab a ham sandwich. Maybe some leftover bacon from yesterday. And a glass of milk would be nice too. He let a light skip into his step, still humming, and skipped into the said room. If anyone caught him acting happy-go-lucky like that, he would never hear the end of it. But at the moment, he didn't care.

He didn't really give a shit about anything at the moment. Nothing at all.

Not to mention he was feeling awfully childish today.

Carefully readjusting his step to his usual walk, he peeked in just in case someone was having some early morning coffee or tea. Spotting no one, he walked in, now whistling, to fill his grumbling stomach. He stretched and let out an odd-high-pitched yawn before reaching towards the cupboard to get a plate.

That's when he noticed something was horribly wrong.

He had to stretch his arm quite a bit to reach said cupboard. Ike yelped and jumped back, examining himself. _Why the hell am I a midget? Did someone sneak a mini-mushroom into my dinner? _He stormed out of the kitchen (quietly, mind you) to give that person a piece of his mind, when a wall mirror in the hall caught his eye.

Brown hair. Short. Childish face.

His eyes widened, and the kid-mercenary gasped. This couldn't be possible! What the fucking hell?

He ran to a broom closet and locked himself in.

_Deep breaths. Deep, refreshing breaths... Aw fuck, I can't get fresh air in a broom closet!_

He burst back out of the closet, looking eerily calm but seriously panicking on the inside.

_Aw fudge, nobody'll recognize me like this! Really, of all things, did I have to turn into myself as a kid? When did I look like this, when I was ten or eleven or something? Shrinking would've been better! I mean, they might recognize me with blue hair, but never with brown! I don't even know WHY I had brown hair back then! Gotta get to the bottom of this mess!_

He dashed off to the room he shared with Marth and Meta Knight, temporarily forgetting about Marth's foul mood in the mornings. He was running a lot faster than usual. And not so loud. He slammed the door open, now panicking externally.

Good thing the prince was a sound sleeper.

But Meta Knight wasn't.

Ike froze when he heard a groan from the other side of the room, coming from Meta Knight's small bed. Not that the mercenary knew that. He paled at the thought of waking Marth up. Breathed a sigh of relief when he saw no movement from Marth's bed besides the gentle rise and fall of the Altean's breathing.

When he saw Meta Knight approaching him though, he nearly screamed. Luckily he didn't. That would've been terrible. Meta Knight stared at Ike. Ike gaped at MK. Dark indigo hair, pale skin, golden slanted eyes, slim face, pretty short. Yet somehow still managing to look terrifying in star-print pajamas and fluffy bunny slippers.

Meta Knight finally mustered the strength to form a sentence.

"Talk about this outside." The former puffball growled and stumbled towards Ike and dragged him out of the room, nearly pulling the mercenary down with him when he slipped on... Nothing really, but he was really unstable on his feet.

Meta dragged him all the way to the kitchen, tripping on every second step. The first thing he did was make himself a strong cup of tea after clumsily dragging Ike to the table. About half a cup of tea was wasted that day. Finally somehow managing to sit down (after missing the chair five times and spilling another quarter of his tea) Meta Knight gave Ike a harsh glare.

"Who are you?" MK snarled, his Spanish accent marring his words. Ike promptly facepalmed, giving the former puffball the universal sign for crazy.

"Take the hair, make it blue, and add about five years, then you might remember." He muttered bluntly and crossed his arms.

Meta Knight's left eye twitched. How dare this knave speak to him in such a way? Ike rolled his eyes and waved his arms.

"Hello? Owner of Ragnell, Final Smash is Great Aether, Signature attack Aether, Side Special Quickdraw, Special Eruption? Refers to Ragnell as a she? Damn Meta, I didn't know you were this slow in the mornings."

Said knight raised an eyebrow before narrowing his eyes. Damn, he really needs that tea. "..." Ike headdesked this time. He then pointed at himself and bellowed:

"IT'S IKE, YOU DOLT!"

The other cringed at the volume and looked away before coughing into his hand. He quickly gave Ike a sideways shut-the-hell-up-before-you-wake-up-the-entire-man sion death glare.

"Oh, sorry. Only you can be so blunt. Not my fault I'm groggy though, with you slamming the door and panicking like that." He snorted before looking at his near-empty teacup in disdain. " It also seems that I have turned into a humanoid. I'm still adjusting to the body and I have a bad... neck cramp, was it?- For sleeping in a bed that suddenly seemed much too small in the middle of the night." Meta Knight glanced back up at Ike with an even more intimidating glare. If looks could kill, Ike would've died, been revived, and died again.

The mercenary shivered. The former ran a hand through messy indigo hair, only to have the bangs fall back in place.

"Now, what happened to you? And why exactly is your hair brown?"

Ike found himself hesitating on the answer. Something he rarely did, really.

He found himself shrugging. "Dunno, I woke up like this, I think. As for the brown hair... IHNFI."

"IHNFI?" Meta Knight questioned, raising an eyebrow again. He must be enjoying the feeling of actually having some.

"I have no fucking idea."

The mercenary found himself facing yet another death glare. Cue game over noise.

Long day ahead, that's for sure.

* * *

The thing that the other two didn't know, was that Ness had also woken up and was staring at himself in the mirror. You see, he woke up to quickly sneak out and try to catch Meta Knight without his mask, but that'd be an excuse for why he really was awake. The real reason was partly because his bed had suddenly seemed cramped and partly because he was REALLY thirsty. His throat was the equivalent of a desert.

The reason he was staring at himself in the mirror in a way that only Peach or Zelda should?

Well, he was actually average height for his age.

If you want it more specifically: He actually looked like someone from Fire Emblem. A real-looking freaking person. Not the chibi style from Mother or Earthbound.

Ho-ly ca-rap.

He couldn't decide whether to rejoice or panic. His mouth was hanging open, unable to form a sentence. If he keeps gaping like that, he'll get a fly in his mouth.

Five minutes into staring at himself, the black-haired PSI user remembered the reason why he woke up. He pushed the thought of actually being proportionate for once aside and let out a hoarse whisper. He really WAS parched.

"To the kitchen!"

He ran through the hallways, relishing the thought of having longer legs and skidded around a corner.

Ness hadn't even brushed his teeth.

The PSI user levitated down the stairs, turning a few more corners before bursting into the kitchen. He was even thirstier than he was before.

Well, the kid forgot everything about being thirsty when he saw who was _in_ the room.

You know who they are. Well, Ness didn't.

Some other guy around his age that looked scarily similar to Ike -just with brown hair- and a dark blue-haired dude with really creepy golden eyes. Ness gulped and opened his mouth to say something until he saw the brunette's hand twitch to a spot on his waist where a weapon would be sheathed if it wasn't so early in the morning.

Nevertheless, the PSI user shut up. The indigo-haired person (Ness couldn't tell how old he was) then spoke in a voice much too familiar to Ness.

"Ness?" The boy blinked.

Silence. Then recognition.

"HOLY CRAP IS THAT META KNIGHT?!" The brunette dashed over to the black-haired boy and clapped a hand to the latter's mouth.

"Shut up!" He hissed through his teeth before removing his hand and crossing his arms. "Do you WANT everybody to wake up?"

Meta Knight just looked into his empty teacup and muttered something along the lines of "pot calling the kettle black".

The brunette just glared at the Star Warrior. "Hey! I heard that!"

Ness continued gaping, before pointing towards the brown-haired boy and exclaiming: "IKE!" Said mercenary smacked him over the head. "No shit Sherlock!" The PSI user rubbed his head. "Ow."

Meta Knight coughed quietly and gestured towards the two to sit down.

The duo wasn't paying attention.

"What was that for?!"

"You were getting on my nerves!"

"Well that's no reason to hit me!"

"Of course it is!"

"No fair! We're the same age now!"

"...Sure."

The Star Warrior glared and started tapping his foot, before getting too annoyed, jumping up and yelling at the two to sit down. The two immediately rushed to claim a seat.

"Now, does anyone have a theory as to how we fell into this... Predicament?"

The table went silent.

Then Ness' eyes widened. _Oh my God. The crystal._

_It did this. I'm sure of it._

_But I need to know-_

"Ness? Something wrong?"

Said person jolted upright and turned towards the voice. Ike. Looking at him in concern.

Ness replied quickly. "Sorry. Spaced out."

The mercenary shrugged.

"But-" Both swordsmen turned to the boy.

"We have to find out who else this happened to and find out what exactly happened. Before the whole mansion completely freaks out. And we'll need some backup."

Ike and Meta Knight could only agree, mildly shocked at the amount of intellect the usually happy-go-lucky boy was pouring out.

They need to get to the bottom of this- But they needed help.

And who knows in what condition the others are stuck in?

* * *

**Ugh. Finally got this done. **

**Wonder what happened to the others? Don't worry, I decided all of their FATES. Muahaha.**

**I know that his seems mildly rushed, mainly because it is. And declining in quality towards the end, since I had no idea what the f*ck I was doing at that point.  
**

**Oh right! The translations from last chapter:**

GUCHI NO ANATA WA SUKOSHI HITO NO MUSUKO! - YOU LITTLE SONS OF BITCHES!

SEIKO! - FUCK YOU!

**... Damn Marth, you have a terrible potty mouth in the morning.**

**Anywho, HUUUGE thanks to the reviewers/favers/followers/people who aren't making themselves known!**

**Give me a sign you're alive!**

**Q: Who's condition do you guys wanna see next? Remember that a few won't be affected~!**


	4. Squees and Laughs, MK Lightens Up

**OH MY NAGA I'M SOOOO SORRY I HAVEN'T UPDATED SOONER ;A;  
**

**I'LL UPDATE NOW.**

**Oh Palutena, so many reviews. *u***

**But as for the reviews themselves, I must have asked the question wrong. Y'know, the question of who you guys wanted to see next? I meant that I already decided what happens to them... I just wanted you guys to vote WHO I'd write about. About how they discovered what happened to them and stuff...**

**But I was still REALLY happy about the reviews.**

**Anywho, on with the story!**

* * *

A figure dashed out of Marth's, MK's and Ike's shared room and bolted towards the girls' room.

_How am I supposed to deal with this? Wait, I already thought about that. Zelda knows best, after all._

Running down the hallway, feet hardly making a sound. Checking around the corner to make sure no one was there. More running. Ducking behind a side-table or bookshelf when the person thought someone was coming. Nobody.

Then the sound of distant laughing drifting up from the kitchen.

_Shit! But who would be up at this time- Oh. Ike. Of course. But who else? There's more than one person... Honestly, which madman gets up at 7 on a Sunday?  
_

The person suddenly crashed into a random bookshelf.

"OW!" He (She? It?) clapped their hands over their mouth and ran.

_Crap, why'd I do that? Stupid, stupid, stupid! Baka!  
_

Finally arriving at the girls' room, the figure stopped and caught their breath. Soft panting. The figure then straightened him/her/itself. A pale hand reached for the doorknob, not pausing to knock or listen if anyone was awake.

_Creak._

* * *

Now that I mentioned Zelda, let's get to the princesses' and female bounty hunter's room. About an hour earlier.

"Zelda? ZELDA!" someone hissed and shook said Hylian princess by the shoulders.

"Ugh, not now, Mother..." Zelda grumbled and buried her face in the pillow. Bad idea.

"Oh for Din's sake! GET UP, BETCH!" The figure (Not the one from the beginning of the chapter) rage-flipped Zelda out of her bed.

Which caused the princess to shriek.

And Peach to sit bolt-upright in her bed with a frying pan in hand. Samus only shifted in her sleep.

The Princess of the Mushroom Kingdom screamed. "SWEET MUSHROOMS ZELLIE, WHAT HAPPENED?!"

"Dammit Zelda! Why'd you shriek like the sissy you are?" Zelda finally found the time to look at the person who gave her such a rude awakening.

"Sheik?! Wha- How- When-!"

The person- now revealed as Sheik- crossed her arms and glared at Zelda. "Yush?"

Cue another shriek. From Peach this time.

"OHMAIGAWSHZELLIEISTHATSHEIK?!"

Sheik facepalmed. Zelda groaned. Then the latter turned to her alter ego, having finally gathered her wits. Hey, Triforce of Wisdom, after all!

"But we're the same person. How is it possible that you're here, in a separate body?"

The sheikah shrugged. "Beats me."

That when Samus was no longer able to stay asleep. He sat up.

Wait, HE?

This time, three screams were heard.

Not sure if of the fangirl variety or not.

"Why're you guys staring at me like that?"

Awkward silence. Samus looked at himself.

"HOLY SHIT!"

* * *

Alright, let's switch to Ike, MK and Ness to spare us the cursing. And the ear-splitting fangirl screams that'd possibly even be heard all the way to real life.

Yeah, I'll stop talking now.

Ness was poking around in a bowl of Froot Loops, not really interested in anything anymore, lack of sleep finally kicking in. He nearly faceplanted in his soggy cereal three times now. Meta Knight had finally managed to make a cup of tea without spilling more than half of it (he REALLY didn't know what to do with himself) and Ike was downing a glass of milk and chewing on some bacon and scrambled eggs which he made himself- and actually weren't half bad.

They had decided to find out whatever the hell happened to everybody later to keep relative peace and prevent them being mortally wounded. Especially that last part.

Meta Knight stretched and hung off his chair awkwardly before losing his balance (if he had any) and crashing to the ground. Ike immediately choked on his bacon, laughing his head off. Even Ness started laughing.

Wait, never mind. The PSI user had a bottle of coke in his hands. At least he's awake now.

Meta Knight tried to stand up, but his hand slipped and he crashed to the ground again.

"OH MY ASHERA, I CAN'T BREATHE!"

"You should have seen your face, Meta!"

Both kids were in hysterics. Meta Knight glared at them, but the glare seemed to have no effect on them.

Ike was rolling on the ground, holding his stomach, tears of laughter streaming from his eyes. Ness was pounding the table. And Meta Knight was getting royally pissed.

Which is a REALLY bad sign.

Unless that particular person can't even stand on his feet. Then you're free to laugh as much as you like.

Then Link decided to bound into the kitchen, slamming the door open.

He glanced around the room once before a shocked expression settled on his face. All three present braced themselves for the freak-out-

But it never came. Instead, Link collapsed to his knees in hysterics.

"Oh Farore, if that's you, Meta, then this entire scene is PRICELESS!" he chuckled before standing back up plopping on a seat next to where Ike was sitting. He punched said mercenary in the shoulder after pulling him back to his seat.

"Hey Mini-Ike!" Ike looked shocked for a moment, before grinning and punching Link back. Meta Knight attempted to scramble back to his seat as well, but slipped on nothing and faceplanted on the floor, flailing limbs knocking his teacup from the table and making it land on his head. The other three promptly fell out of their chairs.

"OHMYGODTHISISHILARIOUS!"

"Why isn't there a camera around when I need one?"

"Oh sweet Nayru!"

Yes, Meta Knight DID look hilarious like that. Sitting on the ground, shirt soaked and teacup on his head. And the star-print pajamas. Don't forget those. The other three were all rolling on the floor, laughing their asses off.

And you know what?

Meta Knight started laughing, too.

* * *

Oh, looks like the girls finally sorted everything out. Let's switch back to them.

"This feels awkward..."

Samus was staring at his feet, pouting. The other girls were still gaping at the now male bounty hunter. Sheik was still standing a ways from Zelda, enjoying her separate body. Peach reached out to poke him for the millionth time in an hour.

"Your hair's so shooort~" said princess giggled, poking his head again. Samus reflexively slapped her hand away. Zelda and Sheik rolled their eyes.

"Will you please stop staring at me like that?"

"Samus, I really do have to admit that you look pretty good."

"Oh shut up, Zelda." Samus shifted uncomfortably.

Peach pouted and shook her finger chidingly. "Now that's not how a gentleman should behave, dearie."

"... Why do I share a room with you again?" The bounty hunter grumbled. Sheik snorted at that comment. Everybody turned to stare at her.

"... What?"

Zelda was trying to hold back a snort of amusement and Samus was snickering. Peach was giggling almost uncontrollably.

"Y-you snorted!" The blonde princess exclaimed, trying to look dignified while giggling, but failing. Samus covered his mouth with his hand to hide his laughter, muttering something along the lines of 'pig'.

The sheikah was not amused. She crossed her arms and let out a small "Hmph."

That only sent the girls (and that one guy) in peals of laughter.

"You looked so much like Ike just now!" Samus was laughing his head off.

"The pose, the look, even the freaking grunt!" the Hylian princess added.

Peach was laughing so hard that she couldn't even talk.

Sheik suddenly stopped glaring and whirled around, facing the door. Zelda abruptly stopped laughing and clapped a hand to both Samus and Peach's mouths. Samus fell over in surprise.

"Quiet, I hear something." Both of them hissed at the same time.

Creepy.

The other two non-Hylians strained their ears to hear something...

"OW!" All four present jumped.

"Oh my 1-Up Mushrooms! Who was that? The poor dear sounds hurt-"

"Shh!" Peach immediately quieted down.

Quiet, quick footsteps. Whoever was sneaking around out there was pretty good at sneaking around. REALLY good, actually. Samus and Peach had to listen carefully to pick them up.

The footsteps stopped. Heavy panting outside. Quiet cursing that only the two Hylians could pick up.

Footsteps towards the door. Everybody put theirselves in a fighting stance.

The doorknob turned and the door opened slowly-

"CHARGE!" Peach bellowed. Everybody lunged forwards on instinct, knocking the unwanted visitor backwards. And causing all of them to land in an awkward dogpile.

There was a girlish shriek/yell. "Argh! Get off me!" There was an undignified scuffle (minus Sheik, she jumped away gracefully) to get a better view of the person they just randomly jumped out of the blue...

Nobody expected who they just bowled over.

Flat-chested, blue eyed short blue haired girl. Almost mistakable for a guy. But the most baffling part...

The tiara.

Marth's tiara. And the creepy similarity with the blue-haired prince himself.

Guess!

"... The fuck are you?" Peach smacked Samus over the head. "Language!"

The girl only gaped and pointed, before sitting up. She continued gaping, before muttering in Japanese before finally gathering enough strength to utter half a sentence.

"Samus-san?"

Sheik pointed at the girl accusingly. "Why in Hyrule do you have Princess' tiara?"

The girl spun around to face the sheikah, looking like she was about to retort. Then she took a double take and gaped again. Just like a fish out of water. She flailed before falling over again and immediately standing up again.

"DEAR NAGA IS SHEIK SUPPOSED TO EXIST IN A SECOND BODY?"

Zelda then answered, scrutinizing the girl. "No. Who are you?"

The girl then dashed over to Zelda with incredible speed and grabbed her by the collar. Peach whipped out her frying pan, ready to attack her, but Sheik held her back. "ZELDA! Help meeeeeeeeeeee! It's Marth and I woke up like this! I don't want to be humiliated as a girl! Even worse since I'm almost proving the point of the 'Martha' joke which I despise so much! HELP ME! For the love of Naga, PLEASE!" the bluenette blubbered. Zelda seemed unfazed, until she let the first few sentences sink in.

"Hold it! Repeat the third sentence you said."

"Uhhh... It's Marth and I woke up like this?"

Zelda then narrowed her eyes at the girl and grabbed her by the shoulders, making her release her grip on Zelda's collar. She stared the latter down. The girl gulped.

"What's the name of Marth's sword?"

The girl's eyes widened, before narrowing as well. "Falchion.

"Marth's last name?"

"Lowell."

"First game?"

"Shadow Dragon: Blade of Light, first in the Fire Emblem series."

"Uhhhmmmm... I think I ran out of questions..." Oh, looks like Zelda's brain shorted out for a bit.

"Ike drools in his sleep and snores like a bulldozer. Meta Knight looks like Kirby without his mask. Link has an almost unnatural sense of smell. Pit has an addiction to jellybeans. That enough?" Marth crossed her arms. Everyone present blinked.

"I didn't know any of that." Samus mumbled. Peach was giggling.

"I knew that about Link, but not about the others." Sheik and Zelda said at the same time. They looked at each other with creeped out faces. The others stared.

Awkward silence.

Then the Hylian princess turned to Marth.

"So. How should I help you?"

Marth then answered, crossing her arms. "Help me pretend that I'm still male, what else?"

* * *

**OH MY DIN FINALLY DONE.  
**

**Why'd I give myself a minimum 2000 word limit?**

**lkdjf;alskdjaslf. Sorry for the long wait, my brain melted halfway through. **

**Who managed to guess who the figure was at the beginning of the chapter before he/she was revealed as Marth? Please review!**

**Oh and does anybody want to RP SSBB sometime? Here's the link: us12 .chatzy 642 112 8707 5769 Just remove the spaces. :P Try to spread the word!**

**~Scales out!**


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